i went to church today. now im here sitting in front of the computer, thinking about things that don't really matter. this is part of my lovelife, but i cant say that it IS my lovelife. maybe this is HIS lovelife, but not mine.

today i bumped into this guy named..no, i think i shouldnt say his name. haha. i rejected this guy FOUR times. the fourth time i rejected him was just the week before last. then i bumped into him today. he didnt even feel awkward. he got used to it. hehehehe..

the first time he said some things about his feelings was when i was still living in the same subdivision as him. before, i always went outside to play badminton with the other kids. one night, it was late and i was still outside (the subdivision feels so safe that you can go home by midnight) playing badminton with yumi. then this guy came with a bike, his hair was all messy that night and he wasnt wearing a shirt. i could tell he was drunk. then he parked his bike right next to me. though i knew he was drunk, i didnt feel scared. i treated him like he's sober, and our conversation went like this:

him: hi shoo-ey.
chiui: shoo-ey?
him: baket anu ba?
chiui: chi-wi, hindi shoo-ey.
him: ah..shiwi.
chiui: *laughs*..lasing ka talaga.
him: hindi ako lasing ah, may tama lang.
chiui: may tama lang?
him: oo. red horse kasi ininom ko eh, para may sipa.
chiui: sipa??
him: oo.
chiui: ...........
him: .........
chiui:.......
him: *laughs* niloloko mo naman ako eh!

i still remember that because i still think the silent part was funny. hahahaha.. then he told me he'd go back home to put on a shirt, but when he got away, i didnt wait! hahaha.. then weeks came, he always talked to me. i think he's funny because he has this bisaya accent. actually, i think he's cute, but being cute is not enough.

then one night, he gathered all the courage he had to tell me that he likes me. it was when we were playing badminton in the middle of the night. i then told him that i didnt want him to court me because i dont think i can give him a chance. i didnt think he had even a small amount of hope. after that we changed the subject. he sounded really sad, so i left him alone and went home.

then we didnt talk for months, but i met him again. i remember that i have a boyfriend that time. there was a basketball competition that time, and he was on the pink team. i watched the game. i even did him a favor by buying him a drink and holding his money and blingbling (rings and bracelet). i always treated him as my best guy friend before. then after the game he asked me to accompany him to buy apples.

chiui: ano? mansanas??
him: oo. dali na..
chiui: bakit mansanas? naglilihi ka ba?
him: eh..oo. buntis ako.
chiui: *laughs* yuck!
him: pag di moko sinamahan sasabihin ko sayo!
chiui: ang ano?

then he went on expressing his feelings over again. i didnt pay attention again. i just stopped him and said that im taken.

him: ang daya mo. bat ako dati hindi.,..
chiui: kelan?

i was pretending. i knew what he was talking about. bah, who cares. it's too late now, and i know to myself that it wouldnt be possible. i cant give him anything.

the third time was when i was sitting on the sidewalks with kids and this japayuki lady (she is nice. shes just too sexy). another guy (that i can NEVER understand) was with him and he (the rejected guy) treated me differently. he didnt smile at me nor did he greet me. it felt like it was a set-up. then i finally figured out that it was really a set-up. i was with *i*o*, him, n**s**, **, a*b*k, and *i*o. theyre all guys, but i wasnt with them in the first place. i was really going to michelle's house, but nobody was home. then they came and cornered me, telling me that there's something this guy wanted to say. i gave him a chance to talk at least.

guy1: chiui, teka muna, wag ka munang umalis!
me: what? bakit?
guy2: ayan o. sabihin m n kasi!
admirer: eh umalis muna kasi kayo!
guy3: wag na..dito mo na sabihin!

he wanted his friends to go away so he can tell me everything. after 30 minutes (kidding) his friends left us alone. he told me the same things again. i told him that i have nothing to say. that im not ready and i think he's drunk. then i heard from a distance his friends said:

"awwwww!"

that was it.

the fourth time was while we were chatting. i dont think that was serious. what happened that day was the same thing, only it was IMed to me. then i told him the same things. this circle never ends!!

what happened today was like this: i was having my money changed from a nearby store. i saw someone park his bike. it was him. he had a different hair colour. he is thinner. he looked more human. hahaha.. then i panicked.

him: hi chi-wi. (he got it right this time)
chiui: hi! (i didnt give him a look)
him: o bakit? nahihiya ka?
chiui: ako? hindi ah!

-------i got my money changed---- i attempted not to say goodbye but..

him: bye chi-wi!
chiui: bye! (still not looking)
him: ah hindi tumingin..

there. really, he acted like nothing happened. even though he tried to win me four times, i dont think he's in love with me. we dont know each other too well. i mean, yes we talked a lot, but we didnt talk about things deeper. basta! hehe..youll feel that there's something lacking, but i admire his persistence and patience.

and actually even from the start i didnt think we'd be together. i want christian guys, and i dont like guys that smoke. BUT i made a mistake on those things. that boyfriend that i mentioned earlier. no use in blogging about him, he's a waste of time, energy, and electricity. haha..

well..'til here. thanks for being here!! God bless!

Labels: lovelife, rejection

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